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| Section 1 | Section 2 | Section 3 | Section 4 | Section 5 | Section 6 | Section 7 | Section 9 | |||||
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| Meditation - Exercise 1 | |||||
| Exercise
1: Find your centre The goal of this exercise is to find your centre, where you can hear yourself think (a vitally important step in gaining self-awareness). It’s a place within yourself where you can ask questions, receive messages, and generally regain a sense of peace and harmony, even if only for a few moments. Where is it and how do I get there? It is a place of calm within. Simply be willing. Sounds too simple, right? But it really is just that easy. Begin by finding a quiet place where you can be undisturbed for five or ten minutes. Once you are settled comfortably, take a slow deep breath in, and gently let it out. Many find it helpful to ask the Universal Intelligence for assistance upon starting. There is no need to concentrate on your breathing, or to breathe in any particular fashion. There is no need for any special equipment or materials. If you choose to, you can burn a candle or play some soothing music to become relaxed. However, no rituals are required in order to communicate with the Universal Intelligence. (In fact, performing rituals can show that fear is present, because the fear says that something terrible will happen when the ritual is not performed. Then ritual becomes superstition, and superstition is nothing more than fear that has become habit.) What can happen when I get there? If you feel comfortable closing your eyes, go ahead and do so. You’ll know you’re in the right space when your eyelids flutter lightly. If your eyes are open, you will need to pay very close attention to yourself – your body and your mind. You may feel your energy change when you’ve found the right place, or your thoughts may sound different. How long should it last? As long as you're comfortable and able to stay focused on paying attention to your thoughts. If you lose focus or forget to pay attention for a few seconds, just return to listening to your thoughts when you remember. How often, and how many times should this be done? At least twice a day (once upon awakening and again before going to sleep). After a week or two, you'll likely be able to find your centred space quite easily. Then it will be time to go on to Exercise 2 Self-test Whatever happens, try to record your experiences in a journal of some sort. It can serve as a reminder of your journey toward self-awareness. |
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| Meditation - Exercise 2 | |||||
| Now
that you’ve found your centre Now that you can go to your centred space more easily and are getting used to listening to your thoughts, it's time to start asking some questions. For this exercise, you will need a simple question or two. Here are a few suggestions, but feel free to use your own:
Remember to ask
for assistance while getting centred, then ask your
question(s) once you're centred. Listen to your thoughts
for at least 15 to 30 seconds after each question. Pay
close attention to your body too, for your guide may use
physical signals to communicate with you. |
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| Meditation - Notes | |||||
| Notes Sometimes in meditation the Universe will use words like "thee", "thy", "thou", etc. when working with us. Other times they might address us as "Child of God", or "Child". This is not meant in any way other than lovingly, respectfully. When this happens, it is completely unmistakable that it is the Universe speaking, and not just our own thoughts. We can be certain then that there is specific information that needs to be given to us, and that questions need to be asked in order to gain full understanding of what is being given. Whatever is experienced, questions must be asked in order to find the correct interpretation and gain full understanding about what has been given. Why? Because the Law of Free Will requires the Universal Intelligence to tell us what we want to hear, or what we already believe to be truth, it is up to us to make the conscious choice to set aside our preconceived ideas and belief systems before inviting communication. In fact, recognizing all of our belief systems becomes crucial when working with the Universal Intelligence. Whatever the experience, questions must be asked of our own guide in order to gain full understanding about what has been given. |
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| Apologizing - Exercise 1 | |||||
| What is
guilt? Guilt is an attitude and an emotion, and it makes us have certain thoughts.. It means that we're feeling responsible for not meeting expectations, no matter whose they are - or - that we're having excessive feelings of remorse for deeds both done and not done. Guilt is just as hurtful and damaging to us as any of the other negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions. Guilt can cause us much pain, and can cause us to behave in ways that are potentially harmful to many. Guilt, condemnation and remorse are interwoven, and all keep us stuck in the past. It is important to remember always that we cannot change the past. We can only learn from it and use it to create change in the here and now. We can never be sure what the future holds. We only live now, and only now can be affected by our behaviour. People often “lay guilt trips” on others to manipulate and to get their own way, that is, to control others. (e.g.: It's all your fault. If you don't do what I ask, you're bad. Remember how you hurt me in the past?) Sometimes parents take on responsibility for their children's actions. This can help no one: the parent suffers multiple injuries and the child fails to learn responsibility. Since guilt requires punishment, those who feel guilt over some past experience often meet negative experiences in the present. This is not because God wants to punish us. It happens because we "expect" some form of punishment. And, since the Universal Intelligence is responsive, our expectation creates the negative experience. Another form of guilt is Survivor's Guilt. This is a crippling condition that can create much pain, discomfort and negativity, and can become an addiction. Losing loved ones through death caused by accident, illness, childbirth, suicide or euthanasia, murder/acts of terrorism or genocide can create survivor's guilt. Remaining healthy when a loved one becomes unwell can also create it, as can growing up as the "normal" child in a family with a "special needs" child. (Also, some Christians believe that since Christ died on the cross for them, they must prove their appreciation by inflicting pain upon themselves.) Survivor's guilt says things like: "I cannot and will not ever succeed. Nothing of lasting benefit can or will come from me. There cannot/will not be any joy in my life. If something good does happen, I cannot/will not celebrate. I cannot/will not contribute to a society that allowed (whatever) to happen." Why? To find enjoyment in life could be seen as a betrayal of the loved one, or of the family. It could be seen as a failure to punish oneself sufficiently. It is important to remember that God does not ever judge, criticize or condemn us. It is also important to remember that the loved one's experiences were a part of their path. We cannot walk their path for them. We must allow them the dignity of ownership. We must not use their experiences as an excuse for failing to live well, or for holding onto resentment or for seeking vengeance, or for punishing ourselves. How can I tell if I'm feeling guilty about something? One way is to pay attention to our thoughts. Words like, "I'm so bad" or "I don't deserve" can indicate that we're feeling guilty about something. Another way to find out is to get centred and ask our guide. What does it feel like to get rid of guilt? Sometimes it can feel as though a great weight has been lifted from our shoulders. We might feel like laughing or crying, or maybe like dancing, or maybe as though we have a new source of energy. How do we get rid of guilt? The goal of this exercise is to rid yourself of any guilt you might have over things you have done or not done, or said or not said throughout your life. We get rid of guilt by apologizing. Apologizing is a tool to help us regain respect - both from others and for self. To do it, simply be willing. Sounds too simple, right? But it really is just that easy. Ask for assistance. Get centred. From your centred space, think of someone you've harmed, or of someone with whom you're angry (could be a person, could be your guide, or could be God). Ask your guide to give you some understanding about your behaviour and your choices, that is, why did you do whatever you did? What can happen when I do it? The pain can stop, sometimes immediately. How often should this be done? Whenever you've failed or harmed someone, before shame and despair set in and before the need for self-punishment becomes irresistible. Self-test Think of the person to whom you're apologizing. Try to picture them in your mind's eye. Do you feel differently than you did before this exercise? If not, then the exercise is not yet complete. Ask your guide for more information about the situation. The exercise is complete when your can think about the person and the situation without having any negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions. After you've apologized to at least five people in meditation, it'll be time to move on to Exercise 2. Whatever happens, try to record your experiences in a journal. |
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| Apologizing - Exercise 2 | |||||
| Now
that you know how to apologize Now that you've apologized in your heart, it's time to "put it on paper". Write down whatever you feel needs to be said to express your regret to the person you've harmed, and tell them that you'd like to make amends. Self-test If the person is no longer in your life, then hold a ceremony to dispose of the letter. If the person is still involved in your life, and if you feel right about doing so, mail the letter to them or phone and read it aloud to them. If you want to apologize but don't wish to re-open a completed relationship, that's okay. Just try to be sure about your reasons for not wanting them in your life; try to be sure that it's not because you're still angry with them or with yourself. Leave it up to them to decide what to do about your apology; that is, it's their choice whether to forgive you. If they choose not to forgive you, that's okay, that's their choice. You have done what you need to do to move forward, so let it (and them) go. Be sure to record your experience in your journal. |
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| Apologizing - Notes | |||||
| Apologizing is like a muscle, and exercising it regularly will help to ensure strong spiritual health. Holding onto guilt does nothing to help anyone. Refusing to apologize can create all sorts of health problems for us. | |||||
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| Forgiveness | |||||
| What is
it? Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves so that we can leave the past in the past. It is a behavioural pattern. Forgiveness means not resenting those who have angered us or failed us in some way. We can do this by communicating (whether in person or even just on paper), our feelings of anger or disappointment to the concerned individual(s). This can validate our emotions, thereby enabling us to release the person and the experience. It is often easier to forgive when we understand fully why something has happened, or why someone has done something, but it is not necessarily required. Forgiving others does not mean allowing abusive or negative behaviour. It is not a bargaining chip. Forgiving someone does not necessarily mean that we can trust that individual to change his or her behaviour. Forgiveness is a gift we give to ourselves to allow ourselves to grow spiritually and emotionally and to allow our wounds to heal - spiritually, emotionally and physically. Just as important as forgiving others is the need to forgive ourselves (see guilt). The Universal Intelligence forgives each and every one of us instantaneously, for since there is no such thing as sin, there can be nothing to forgive. The Universal Intelligence sees all human experience as "education". |
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| Forgiveness - Exercise 1 | |||||
| What
does it feel like to forgive? Sometimes it can feel as though a burden has been lifted from one's chest or back, or as if someone put out the fire inside. How do I do it? Simply be willing. Sounds too simple, right? But it really is just that easy. Ask for assistance. Get centred. From your centred space, think of someone who makes you angry, or who has failed you or harmed you in some way. Ask your guide to give you some understanding about the person and the situation, that will help you to see their humanity. Say the words, "I forgive you" and mean it. What can happen when I do it? The pain can stop, sometimes immediately. How often should this be done? Whenever someone fails you, hurts you or makes you angry, before resentment sets in and before the urge for revenge becomes irresistible.. Self-test Think of the person you have forgiven. How do you feel when you see his or her face? Is it different to how you felt before this exercise? If it's the same, then the exercise is not yet complete. Ask your guide for more information about the situation. The exercise is complete when you can think about the person who hurt you without having any negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions. After you've forgiven at least five people, it'll be time to move on to Exercise 2. Whatever happens, try to record your experiences in your journal. |
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| Forgiveness - Exercise 2 | |||||
| Now
that you know how to forgive Now that you know how to forgive others, it's time to start forgiving yourself. For this exercise, you will need a question or two. Here are a couple of suggestions:
Remember to ask
for assistance while getting centred, then ask your
question(s) once you're centred. Listen to your thoughts
for at least 15 to 30 seconds after each question. Pay
close attention to your body too, for your guide may use physical signals to communicate
with you. |
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| Forgiveness - Exercise 3 | |||||
| Now it's time to forgive everyone. Think of anyone, from any time in your life, for whom you're holding a grudge. Forgive them - now - because not doing so would be like storing one rotten apple in with the good ones | |||||
| Forgiveness - Notes | |||||
| Forgiveness is like a muscle, and exercising it regularly will help to ensure strong spiritual health. The challenge is to realize that holding onto negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions and directing them at the source of one's pain do nothing to hurt the other person. Non-forgiveness can create all sorts of health problems, but not for the other guy! | |||||
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| Grieving | |||||
| What is
it? Grieving is the process of coming to terms with life's difficult losses. No matter what the experience, if one is ever to find peace one must find some way to let go of whatever was lost. It is holding on that keeps one stuck in a cycle of sorrow and self-pity. There's no "right" way to grieve: there are as many different ways to grieve as there are people. The longer we put it off, the less likely it is that we will do it. Unresolved grief can manifest in our lives in many ways:
How do I
let go? |
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| Self-esteem | |||||
| What is
it? Self-esteem is the ability to appreciate one's good and not-so-good thoughts, attitudes, emotions, belief systems, desires and behaviours without judgment, criticism or condemnation. Self-esteem and self-respect go hand in hand. Believe it or not, we are born with these qualities, but we can lose them all too easily. The challenge then, is to regain them. Good news! We can learn how to do just that. Once we learn the root cause(s) of why we withhold self-esteem and respect from ourselves, we can begin to earn them back. How? By accomplishing small tasks that help us to see our worth. Gaining self-esteem and respect is not a quick process, but, as with apologizing, forgiveness and tolerance, can be learned and strengthened by practicing. Here are some of the behaviours that can destroy self-esteem:
Lack of self-esteem can lead to feelings of guilt and shame, and guilt and shame can lead to negative behaviours like verbal or physical agression, agressive driving, binge drinking or shopping, gambling, etc. How do I
do it? What can
happen when I do it? |
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| Sniping | |||||
| What is
sniping? It's taking every single opportunity to point out someone's flaws to make them feel bad and/or to make yourself feel big and powerful. It's judgment, criticism and condemnation, and it's a passive/aggressive act of revenge. It is NOT done out of a desire to help someone. It is done because of a desire to make yourself feel better about yourself. What if I do it? If you catch yourself doing it, look within to find out which thoughts, attitudes or emotions made you feel the need to strike out verbally. How do I stop doing it? Ask for assistance. Get centred. Listen to your thoughts. Ask your guide to help you understand the root cause of your behaviour. Once that undertanding has been gained, it becomes easier to let go of the need to react in such a way. Remember: No one deserves to be treated that way! What can happen when I stop? At first? Probably not too much. There might still be the desire to strike out verbally, but resisting temptation really can be its own reward. A feeling of pleasure arises when one takes the high road. Self-worth grows along with self-esteem. As those traits strengthen, the need for the old behaviour decreases - often dramatically. Eventually, you'll find it hard to believe that you ever sniped! What if someone does it to me? Look within to see which of your words or actionsmight have caused the individual to react in such a way. Check with your guide to see whether you have some negative belief systems about yourself. Do you often find people treating you disrespectfully? Do your thoughts continually repeat past negative experiences? See victim. If so, the root cause may well be an inner child issue. Once the issue has been resolved, new behaviours and beliefs become easier to adopt. Whatever happens, try to record your experiences in a journal. |
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| Tolerance | |||||
| What is
it? Tolerance is the ability to observe people or to have experiences without having any negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions. When we see something we don't like, the tendency is to have a negative thought about it. Sometimes the dislike can even become an obsession. It becomes an obsession when we focus on trying to make that thing change, when, in all likelihood, changing it is completely beyond our control. Becoming tolerant is neither simple nor quick, but, as with apologizing and forgiveness, can be learned and strengthened by practicing. |
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| Tolerance - Exercise 1 | |||||
| How do
I do it? Ask for assistance. Get centred. Look in the mirror (full length if possible). Listen to your thoughts. Pay attention to every single negative word you have to say about yourself. Ask your guide to help you understand the root cause of each of those thoughts. What can happen when I do it? The thoughts become clear. A feeling of pleasure arises. How often should this be done? Start with once a day and keep practicing until you can observe yourself with loving eyes. The ultimate goal is to have no negative thoughts at all, about anyone. While that may sound impossible, the important thing is to keep practicing. Self-test Look at yourself and listen carefully to your thoughts. When you can watch for 15 seconds without having any negative thoughts at all, it'll be time to lengthen the duration of watching and listening. Increase to 20 seconds, then to 25 and then to 30. (Until you have become adept at staying focused on hearing your thoughts for any longer than that, the exercise becomes difficult to monitor.) Practice, practice, practice. Whatever happens, try to record your experiences in a journal. |
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| Tolerance - Exercise 2 | |||||
| Now
that you've become accustomed to looking at yourself with
love, it's time to enlarge the picture. Ask for assistance. Get centred. Turn on the television. Watch. Listen to your thoughts. It's ok to change channels while watching, but remember to focus on hearing your thoughts. Here's a sample of what you might hear: "That's terrible. He/she should/shouldn't wear that colour. He/she is ugly. That's beautiful. How can they make crap like that? That's stupid. What a mess. How can people treat one another that way? Those poor animals. That hairstyle is ridiculous on her. Those people should know better than to let themselves get so fat." Most of these statements indicate that judgment, criticism and condemnation have taken place, and are just a random sampling of what goes on in our thoughts when we watch television (or when we observe people anywhere!). The challenge in this exercise is to watch television without having any negative thoughts at all. When you can watch for 15 seconds with no negative thoughts, it'll be time to lengthen the duration of watching and listening. Increase to 20 seconds, then to 25 and then to 30. The longer, the better! Practice, practice, practice. |
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| Tolerance - Exercise 3 | |||||
| Now
that you've become accustomed to looking at your physical
appearance (and others') with love, it's time for the
next step - learning to observe your negative behaviours
without having negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions
about them. How can you possibly expect me to do
that?! |
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| Tolerance - Notes | |||||
| Tolerance is like a muscle, and exercising it regularly will help to ensure strong spiritual health. Having negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions harms us all. Intolerance creates much of the turmoil on this planet, because we usually try to change the things we don't like - and when we try to change someone else, we get into trouble. Why? Well, how do you feel when someone tries to "correct" you? It feels like control, right? It feels like we've been judged, criticized and condemned. So then we get angry - maybe with self, but more likely with the one who's trying to change us. So maybe an argument erupts, or worse, maybe communication ceases. Far better to focus on changing our own negative thoughts, attitudes and emotions - something we can actually change. | |||||
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| How to stop worrying | |||||
| What is
worry? Busy thoughts; trying to figure out: how everything is going to turn out; trying to plan everything; trying to figure out what others are thinking or how others will react (or are reacting) to your action(s) Stopping worrying is neither simple nor quick, but, as with apologizing and forgiveness, can be learned and strengthened by practicing. How do I do it? Ask for assistance. Get centred. Listen to your thoughts for about 15 seconds. Pay attention to every single thought you have about something that has not yet happened, or that has already happened.. Ask your guide to help you understand the root cause of why you are thinking about them. Once that understanding has been gained, it becomes easier to let go of the need to obsess. What can happen when I do it? The thoughts become clear. A feeling of pleasure arises. How often should this be done? Start with once a day and keep practicing until you can hear your thought, understand the source of it and then stop it before it's even completed. The ultimate goal is to be worry-free. While that may sound impossible, the important thing is to keep practicing. Self-test Listen carefully to your thoughts. When you can listen for 15 seconds without having any worrisome thoughts, it'll be time to lengthen the duration of listening. Increase to 20 seconds, then to 25 and then to 30. (Until you have become adept at staying focused on hearing your thoughts for any longer than that, the exercise becomes difficult to monitor.) Practice makes progress! Whatever happens, try to record your experiences in a journal. |
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| How to stop worrying - Notes | |||||
| Worrying is like a muscle, and exercising it regularly has helped to ensure a very strong negative pattern. Changing the pattern will take much dedication and practice. | |||||
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| © Copyright 'Making Change in Our Lives' by Sheila A. McBeath 1999-2012. All Rights Reserved | If you would like to print, reproduce or use any of the information within this site, please respect the Copyright by crediting this site (www.ourspiritualnutrition.com) within your material, and by not altering the content in any way. |
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